How I Learned to Love Being Honest

Sœur Gardner and Me

Rough week. We only saw Lorena once (and she is loving life, thank you for your prayers) AND WENT CONTACTING. Have I ever provided you with a percentage of what people believe here in France? On a day where we contact say, 130 people, 60% will be absolute atheists that tell us we're wasting our time and "we'd have better luck talking to pigeons", 20% Non-practicing Catholic that tell us Jesus was a Catholic and we're blasphemous, 10% Muslim (sub-percentage 3% really kind and willing to take a pass-along card, 7% angry for no reason), 7% Buddhists, 2.9% kind but not interested, .1% willing to give us their phone number.  

There is good news to all this, however. I finally got to meet the Das family from Bangladesh that Sœur Gardner and her companion started teaching before I came here. They are wonderful people and their English accents are so adorable. Lorena and this young family have an interest in what we have to offer. They're GOLDEN. Thank you so much for your prayers. They are truly showing in this work. We are not giving up on Aline, either. She means so much to us.

FACTS I LEARNED:

• 40 year old hipster Icelandic men think Mormons are "hip". True story, folks.

• According to my companion, the reason I don't get hit on as often as the other sisters is because I have a boy back home praying that I'll stay with him. Ethan, stop worrying. Your prayers are killing my ego!!

• We may not have a cockroach problem here, but thanks to the river by my house, I wake up with a couple new mosquito bites on my legs and feet every day. I have to cover my feet when I sleep in the blazing summer heat in a country that doesn't believe in air conditioning, or I get eaten alive!! (This isn't even a reference to "The Other Side of Heaven". I'm serious.) 

For some reason I was able to act more comfortably at Zone Conference this go around, despite how nervous I was to have an interview with president. I guess my mind decided to shut off all the stress that's been building up and I could be more of myself around this huge group of people. I noticed that I was laughing and enjoying myself a lot more than usual, and everyone else noticed as well and asked me if I was okay. 

Despite how sad it is that people thought I was naturally emotionless, I loved that I was able to stop pretending to be the missionary I imagined my mission president wants me to be (which turned out to be wrong, because he even told my companion it was good to see me having human contact). I don't know what caused the change, but I all know is that I'm glad it happened. 

Moral of the story: be honest with yourself (*queue 80's motivational video music*) FIST PUMP!

QUOTE OF THE WEEK:

"When you get to the end of all the light you know and it's time to step into the darkness of the unknown, faith is knowing that one of two things will happen: either you will be given something to stand on, or you will be taught how to fly."

-Anonymous

iMuchas gracias por su amor! I pray for all you as well, not just the French/Bengali people.

Sœur Green

P.S. May I toot my own horn for just a moment? In my interview with my mission president, he shared with me his absurd claim that I was learning the language at an accelerated pace and that I should consider picking up a second language a*k*a Spanish because we need more missionaries to talk to all these Spaniards. And with that, I was given the green light to add Spanish to my scheduled studies. So, if ANY of you know Spanish and want to practice with me so I can start preachin' the way by the border, necessita su ayuda, por favor :) Please write me if you'd like y que tenga un buen dia! 

How I Learned to Love Balance (and probably re-learned since I don't keep track of these cheesy titles)

How I Learned to Love Balance (and probably re-learned since I don't keep track of these cheesy titles)

Hit a plateau this week. Last week was fantastic. We had engaged two people to be baptized within 24 HOURS OF EACH OTHER. Yeah, we were feeling pretty much like the miracle team of Eysines, but this week we hit two really hard road blocks. One's anxiety and the other is doubt. I don't think they realize how normal their feelings are. We're helping them try to understand that it's normal to ask questions and seek answers to things they don't understand. If I could get any prayers from America for Lorena and Aline, I share my appreciation for you firsthand. Thank you so much!!

This is right outside my apartment in Eysines.
It's not a castle, mais ça va (but that's okay ;).

FACTS I LEARNED:

• I apparently look more like an actual Georgian (from Europe) than an American. 

• Also, I have a German/Slavic accent???? I honestly don't know how that happened. 

• French people tell me to work on my accent every time I contact them on the street. They should work on their manners simultaneously. 

• On the bright side, I have a good Spanish accent. I trick Spaniards into thinking I actually know what I'm doing when I start spitting out Spanish words at them.

• Shopping is a great reminder to me that I am a peasant with too good of taste.

• Happy meals here come with a dessert!!! Guess what it is.......................a slice of cantaloupe............

• It is a bad idea to practice your beat-boxing while getting ready in the bathroom. Don't ask me why.

• "Blo-go-dare-iya"="thank you" in Bulgarian. Use it sometime.

This is an Asian family that was pretending to fly
around a plaza in Centerville in Bordeaux :)

So my family has already heard a little about Sœur Drumeva, who is a less-active member from Bulgaria (hence the last fact I learned) that we visit every week. She can't come to church because she is severely crippled by a disease that her and my mother actually have in common, multiple sclerosis. She is so wonderful, guys. I don't doubt for a second that I was sent to Eysines because of her. 

The first time I met her was about two weeks ago and it was seriously the most difficult rendez-vous I've ever had. Once I told her that my mother has the same disease, she took my hands and told me to never hide my love for her or waste anytime making her feel less than incredibly happy because the love and support of her only son has kept her from dying for so many years. After I started bawling, she started bawling, and then Sœur Gardner started bawling, and it was just a hot mess. A hot mess, people.

I learned that it's true, we need to show appreciation for those who we can't see in our present living situations. To not waste their time reading insignificant words. ESPECIALLY if they are your family. I love you so much, Mom. I don't tell you enough. You're the reason I work so hard, so that I can become half as strong of the woman you are someday.  Everyone who reads this, tell her happy graduation!!  My mom no longer goes to college, so everyone can stop using that joke. It is expired.

I wish I could help everyone take up Sœur Drumeva's advice and show appreciation. No, this isn't just me being selfish and wanting more letters either :) 

Life is but a short moment. Don't waste it! Sœur Danielle Haley Green

P.S. Pictures from Carcassone...

This is the famous Phelipe family! 

Our DMP from Carcassonne. This is the man who gave me his full-sized classical guitar 
because he wants to me to take it to America. I guess I have a new carry-on bag :)

Special Edition: Quotes from Sœur Dickinson, the senior sister from Wales.

Special Edition: Quotes from Sœur Dickinson, the senior sister from Wales.

Last week, we had gotten a referral that was "way out ville" and we needed the senior couple to drive us out a hour and back to drop off a Book of Mormon and our information. 

Here is an account of everything Sœur Dickinson said in that time...

"Sista Green, you don't cook, do you? Can I ask you if ya got any rich boyfriends back home you could marry?...'Cause he needs to be able to afford a maid who will be a real wife to 'em."

"My parunts wuh raised on organic food, or as they colled it, 'food.' "

Sœur Gardner:  "There's a new elder from Texas that's serving here! He's got the real Texan accent!"

Sœur Dickinson:  "Well, we can't all be good, can't we..."

(to her husband) "Brubby, back up this cah, you silly thing. You were in my pictcha!!!"

"When my son told me 'e started smokin' and felt guilty about comin' to chuch, I looked 'em in the eye and told 'em, 'Stop smokin', you stewpid child!' "

"I really need my laptop. Brubby, we're going to go home and you can go upstairs and grab it for me, if you'd like."

(after dropping her crochet hook) "AW, CRUMBS!!!!"

"Oh, you guys are singin'? Here, let me get ya a note." (Proceeds to pull out a recorder and begins to blow on it.)

"Where the devil is that phone?!?!"

"Is this a letter for us?? Oh, it's from Sadie!! Ohhhh, bless huh...."

"Cinnamon buns. Oh, those are those things ya motha can knock up real quick in the oven, eh?"

"Ya know why we din't stahp for directions? Cause Brubby's a fella."

"Well, we're here. I guess we'll just throw ya out the door then."

Bordeaux is still big and still intimidating, but the miracles are still here. Stay tuned for next time. You all are so amazing for your support and letters. 
I love you! 

Peace and blessings. Peace and blessings.

Sœur Green

How I Learned to Love Branching Out OR Gorging on Nutella because Life is Too Crazy to Not Have Chocolate in Your Mouth

How I Learned to Love Branching Out OR Gorging on Nutella because Life is Too Crazy to Not Have Chocolate in Your Mouth

Week "I-think-I've-already-lost-count"

I moved. AGAIN. I think I am going to die.

So you know how I was living in heaven and about to baptize all our investigators and have a grand ole spiritual party? Well, God thought it would be better for me to watch that all happen from Bordeaux. 

CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT? I took a spoon to the Nutella jar immediately after my mission president hung up the phone after he broke the news to me. 

I honestly feel like I just put all my kids up for adoption. To paint you a picture of that day, I had faucets for eyeballs and a garbage disposal for a stomach. I even got to go to Monsieur Mudarra's house and witness an opening of his heart to the gospel. AND THE PHELIPE FAMILY. I am going to miss their marriage and baptism. Andersen, the dad, offered a prayer that night thanking God that the sister missionaries could be a part of their family and change their lives. Torture was what that was, people. I'm not cut out for this gypsy nomad business.

FACTS I LEARNED:

• Muslim men who are looking for a wife (or a second one) will come up to you on the street while you are just minding your own business and ask you straight up if you are a virgin as if it were a conversation at the dinner table. 

• I am really good at pretending that I don't understand French when Muslims ask me if I am a virgin.

• French word for sunset= Couche du Soleil. Translation: "Sleep of the sun." You're welcome.

• Nutella does not cure all your problems. Or any problems for that matter.

If you know me personally, you know I am ridiculously timid. It's painful almost. Unfortunately, God knows this very well and thought it'd be cool to shake things up for the missionary who thrives in small towns. 

I currently reside in the little hamlet of Eysines in Bordeaux, population: five countries combined. The mission does this to me all the time, puts me in the most uncomfortable situations. And you know what, I'm okay with that. It's hard and sometimes the grocery stores run out of Nutella because you move around too much and need proper sustenance, but being uncomfortable stretches you. I've learned that I can do so much more than I thought I could before the mission. 

Spoiler alert: the obstacles you face are all actually blessings that teach you how to be awesome. How cool is life, I mean seriously. Life gives you Nutella too, so it can't be that bad.

Once again, I love you all. Not as much as Nutella, but I appreciate you beyond my capacity to describe in words. 

Peace out, internet. This pile of depressed, zombie flesh is off to eat more Nutella. 

Sœur Green